Have I Been Ruined?

I can remember as far back as high school being dedicated to my routine. I had morning band practice, afternoon track practice, several committee meetings and church function. All the activities that I had I never missed nor do I remember it being hard to get up for them.

Then college happened. I slept a lot, skipped a lot and stopped caring a lot. Have I been ruined?

For the sixth time I’ve skipped class; the class that I signed up for in an effort to start making my dreams of becoming apart of the medical community via clinical come true. No one made me, and no one is paying for it besides me. I’m the one who will be directly effected if I fail and have to take it again.

I could blame a million things that make me NOT want to go, but I can think of ONE, stronger than a million other things why I should be there.

When did it get so hard? Does stress of job, life, etc. really make it that hard that television vegetation is the only way to find relaxation and escape? Some how I’ve messed up my priorities. Some how I have lost focus and accepted a lazy, sleep selfish way of doing things.

Something has got to change with me because I can’t keep going this way. Some how it’s all got to work out. Some how…

The Mouse Is Playing

Okay, so the boss is away and I (being the mouse) am playing. Actually, I’m the only one representing the department here and do have plenty to do, but I think I need a mental dump break. (<- Haha…I said “dump”)

Lately, or should I say just this month, I’ve been hit with ridiculous bills. Every bill has been (no kidding) $200 for the month January. I own part of a pet deposit, school, cell phone bill, cable/Internet, energy and credit cards. Ugh…I so hate money. I’m a little worried that I’m going to be living off fumes for the next couple of days. I’m half tempted to get ANOTHER credit card to help support the weight, but that just screams trouble for me. Me, who in college managed to max out THREE credit cards and had to live at home with Mom and Dad to pay some of that off. Yeah, not a good idea. 

I’ve been so blessed these last couple of weeks to be working out. I’ve been working out like crazy. Not because I think I’m fat, but because I’ve gotten the taste for it again. Back in June of last year when I paid for a full year’s gym membership I thought “I will get into again” and nothing happened until I moved. Having a roommate really helps the working out. She’ll go and I’ll go. If I don’t then I have to answer to someone who lives one room over. Now, I love it. The cycling class I took this morning kicked my ass but I’m glad it did. It’s now down hill for me in working out. I have yoga tomorrow during lunch and then nothing (unless I want to) until Monday. I might lift weights this weekend after class.

Ah…class. Yes, I start my second degree climb this weekend. I’m finally putting that one foot forward and am just getting it started. I have a weekend class from 9-1 p.m. on Saturdays and Sunday until about May, I think. No more sleeping in, but hello future. I’m nervous. It’s a community college and not that I’m “too cool for school” or anything, but I don’t know what to expect with the students. Will they want to be there? Will they be equally excited about what this class means for them as I will? Will I have a lab partner? Will the teacher be dry and boring? 

I haven’t been to school (college school) in three years now. Three years is a long time to forget things that seemed so natural while you were in it. Parking, textbooks (which have sucked me dry), supplies, backpacks (I don’t have one so I guess I’ll just use a BIG bag) and everything else school. I can’t believe I’m a college student again. Does that mean I am a “student” at movie theaters again? Oh I could go to Apple and get a college discount. I won’t because I’m broke, but I could and that’s the cool part. 

I’ll have to keep you posted, those who are interested, in how it goes.